I have BPD. Why do I destroy everyone I love?

You can’t control how reactive you are to your intense feelings. You have maladaptive coping. You can only cope by destroying everything. I would take B vitamins, methylated ones, to see if that helps. Definitely get lots and lots of exercise. tire yourself out so that when emotional things happen you have less energy to destroy everything. Don’t build things, don’t collect things, Don’t build a beautiful life around you If you know you’re just going to destroy it. build a beautiful life inside of you. get into meditation and exercise and get into a one on one relationship with God, Almighty. And remember to tell yourself when a thought enters your mind that you cannot handle, tell yourself that it is just a thought. Just one thought. It doesn’t have to be true. It might not even be true. Give the thought doubt, maybe the thought is not true. if the thought is not true, what then?

And by the way, a man or woman with very intense feelings is a beautiful thing. You love passionately; quite strongly. Some people really enjoy that and that’s why people attach to you. There’s lots of single people walking around wondering, “why can’t I get a girlfriend? Why am I single?” But people with BPD seem to almost never be single. Why is that do you suppose? It’s because you’re easy to love, so vulnerable and so sweet. Well until you’re burning everything down and trying to kill yourself and others.

Remember the thought that you were thinking is just a thought. Check with others about the facts.

I’m wondering about attachment and transference with the therapist and the idea of escape and fantasy? How much do you think your strong feelings, constant thoughts, desires to be with your therapist are a way to escape from your present life? I wonder if the transference serves another purpose than to show us our wounds and/or past experiences, but is a present coping strategy for managing what we don’t want to face (even if unconsciously) in the present—-current relationships, life circumstances, etc. Can anyone relate to this concept of escape in relation to their therapy relationship? How does this play out for you?